Thursday, September 06, 2007

The Hardest I've Laughed Recently

I have no hesitation in admitting I've gotten serious and boring in the last year and a half of so; my body simply can't take being the life of the party anymore, and my mind isn't too enthusiastic about it either.

Most of the old guys are equally burnt out and the new young guys are of the self-consciously snarky generation that finds it difficult to enjoy anything beyond sitting around making sarcastic remarks.

Nonetheless, one of the new young guys around here is a real model of Old School English Teacher Crazy -- a lecherous degenerate of the first order.

The other week he sat down at the outdoor cafe with us and announced he had somehow contracted four separate venereal diseases at the same time from one woman. They were not diseases he'd ever heard of, and not especially serious, but he was taking anti-biotics for them.

"My balls are swollen and it hurts to pee," he said.

"How swollen?" I asked.

He thought about it. "About twenty percent."

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