Friday, February 25, 2011

Part of The Problem: or Yankee Go Home

I grew up in the Dirty South, back in the 70's and 80's, so unsurprisingly I was exposed to quite a bit of racism.

One time I was driving around with a friend of mine, and he was scathingly castigating all the black people sitting on the porches of their cheap houses, drinking beer out of 40 oz bottles.

You know all the epithets; I don't need to repeat them here.

Then, we drove to his cheap apartment, where we proceeded to sit on the porch and get drunk on 40 oz bottles of beer, with various strippers and unemployed would-be musicians we knew.

One of the strangest (and seemingly fastest-growing) breed of English teachers are these kind of odd tea-bagger/survivalist/conspiracy theorist/ tax protester types.

Convinced that some kind of vast political conspiracy to enslave the people is about to happen in England and America, these geniuses move to oases of individual freedom. . . like Russia, China, and the Middle East.

I hope just writing that down as a sentence shows how fucking stupid that is.

I'm willing to put up with bitching about this or that President, this or that theory about FEMA internment camps or chemtrails or fluoridated water or whatever. You can't really argue with such people about such things.

But one thing I REALLY hate is the expats in other country who relentless bitch about how their home country has been ruined by immigration.

I'm not going to go into all the arguments "fer and agin" immigration -- leave that to the Huffington Post and whoever.

I'm just going to point out that protesting immigration into your country, BY (or while) MOVING TO ANOTHER COUNTRY TO WORK, is the most hypocritical fucking thing you could possibly do.

It's like protesting violent crime by shooting people randomly in the street, or protesting world hunger by going on a hunger strike.

YOU HAVE BECOME THE PROBLEM, not the solution. You have moved to another country, where you are very likely not completely legally employed or paying taxes, and TAKEN A JOB AWAY FROM A LOCAL, in a situation where their unemployment rate is most likely much higher than back in America and England. You have taken an apartment from a local, and possibly a woman, as well, though of course we know HER motivation.

(And if you think there aren't locals who can teach English as well or better than you -- you are again, completely fucking wrong.)

While organized gangs of criminal expat English teachers are as of yet unheard of, I could give you a lengthy list of the crimes I have seen them commit, mostly but not limited to drug use and dealing, vandalism and public drunkenness. Cases of sexual assault are well documented. (Here is but one.)

"Oh yeah but that's not me!" Yeah, well neither is it most of the immigrants you're bitching about, dickweed.

So, please, goofballs -- go do what you always claim the immigrants should do -- go home and work to fix the problems in your own country. Become a police officer, or a social worker, or -- and here's a brilliant idea -- teach English to immigrants back in your home country to help them better assimilate and get decent legal work.

Hell, go check yourself into a FEMA internment camp. It's about as logical as bitching about immigrants while living abroad.


Anonymous said...

SNAP! you're right, why does it seem like all the new teachers are crazy middle-aged men with a political agenda these days?

Anonymous said...

They're out there teaching for the same reason everybody is -- alcohol, pussy, or just having failed to cope with life back home -- they just cover it up with political rhetoric.

Eve said...

I'm so glad you posted this. I thought I'd left all the racist, right-wing hypocrites back home in the states, but, alas, no.

While I have not yet heard anti-immigration rhetoric from the foreigners here in Korea, I have heard some very racist statements. This is particularly close to my heart because I'm Mexican American, and Mexican immigrants currently have the dubious honor of being the main conservative scapegoat for all of U.S. society's ills.

Your depiction of these overseas teachers reminds me of a certain expat who trashes the current U.S. president as one who takes away rights of U.S. citizens ... while said expat lives in a country where the rights of citizens are shaky at best and almost non-existent for foreigners.

But like you said, it's no use arguing with these people. Best to let them simmer in their own hatred.

I did meet an American girl here who compared North Korean defectors to illegal Mexican immigrants and I was pretty stunned at that level of ignorance.

English Teacher X said...

oh, don't get complacent, Eve, I'll probably be busting on frumpy idealistic left-wing chicks any day now.

Eve said...

Awesome, looking forward to it! Now that I think about it, it's been a while since you went on one of your anti-feminist misogynist rants, too.

Kirabati said...

Great post...... i'm sure some of your former colleagues are reading that thinking 'Is he talking about me'? English Teachers are some of the bitterest people out there..... like you said if you don't like your life just transform it.

Anonymous said...

because anything said about women, that goes against their self interest, is automatically "misogynist". Here's something misogynist for you: Women have such poor rhetorical skills that they fail to see that labeling everything that is said, that goes against their interest as "misogynist", is actually an intellectually weak straw man argument. In other words, an argument of a lesser mind.

But I digress.

X, I get your logic in you article. I do. And all of the tea party FEMA camp stuff is oh so 2002. However, I think that a lot of the anti-immigrant perspective isn't so much based on jobs as it is the social problems that occur with large influxes of differing races. If I went to Hawaii, I would be sympathetic to their anti-"Howlie" sentiment. Even though I'm a howlie. Its their island. I won't go further into it, but will leave you to draw your own conclusions with this perspective as a context.

Eve said...

@English Teacher X - this is like the third or fourth time one of your anonymous commentators has tried to pick a fight with me. I don't think I've ever engaged, and I'm not going to start now. Meaning, @anonymous, I won't be rising to the bait.

Teacher X, If you and I disagree, that's one thing. If one of the guys who follows you (and probably listens to Tom Leykis), I give a shit less and won't waste my time. This is YOUR blog.

@anonymous - let teacher x fight his own battles, you dumb fuck. and why don't you read his posts and all the comments while you're at it.

Anonymous said...

english teacher x is a misanthrope, not a misogynist

Eve said...

@anonymous - you know, the "misogynist rant" comment was more or less a joke (which i'm pretty sure teacher x got). i should have said "sexist" instead. this is not an angry judgment about his character or his blog - i've been a reader for more than a year and seriously enjoy reading his posts, even when he refers to women as trollops.

many of his anonymous commentators, however, are total dicks. i'm pretty sure they're the type who only get action via their hands, and are just living vicariously through teacher x's exploits.

i'm the type of chick who really enjoys bukowski, too, even though he essentially viewed most women as nothing more than a place to stick his dick in.

ps - @english teacher x - sorry to hijack the comment thread like this -- i've given this way too much head space.

Paddy said...

Great post! I endorse the spirit, if not the language, wholeheartedly!

Anonymous said...


I'm not sure if you are posting as 'anonymous' because you are having the same problem as me posting via google, however, I think you need to get a pair of nuts the size of Eve's and leave your name.


Ken MacDougall

English Teacher X said...

I daresay you are thinking about Anonymous's comments a lot more than he's thinking about yours. . . which is of course why he does it. . .

Eve said...

@Ken - Too cool re: my nuts. Thanks for having my back, man!

@Teacher X - Yes.