Addicted to Fucking

Sex addiction.

Yeah, I know, right? Sign me up for that one! Meth addicts lose their teeth, go insane, and have heart attacks, and sex addicts get to fuck all the time!

So of course every would-be comedian makes jokes like that, and on the face of it does sound pretty ridiculous. "I wasn't aware that could be considered a problem," Kirk Douglas reportedly said when his son Michael Douglas went into rehab for it.

But you know, if the reality TV show era has taught us anything -- compulsive behavior is the problem, not the activity itself. You wouldn't think that collecting stuff would be a problem, either, but look at this poor slob on HOARDERS:



So basically, anything you do to excess can consume and ruin your life, even seemingly harmless shit. Drinking and drugs just have more extreme physical effects; fucking and gambling have more pronounced social effects.

I saw this move recently, SHAME, about a guy who's got a bit of a problem with the pussy. He's dealing with it fairly well -- he doesn't drink much and he's extremely successful at his corporate job -- we see him celebrating some vaguely-defined corporate success with his boss and he lives in what would be an enormously expensive apartment in Manhattan.


But it's all beginning to cost him -- he's seemingly cut himself off from normal relationships to the extent that he can't even perform when he goes out with a nice girl from the office. He's driven to spank it even at work, where his accessing porn sites has infected the company computer. In the movie of course it all comes to a grimy boil when his equally slutty and disturbed sister comes for a visit, and he bottoms out in what a lot of internet doofuses would probably describe as the most awesome night out ever.

(I made a tweet once speculating that the difference between a rock-bottom confession and a manosphere fratire funny story is usually just tone and marketing.)

If you check out the movie -- and I recommend it -- notice that it's not just the fucking that the guy is addicted to -- he needs random anonymous couplings and masturbation. It's like the old joke about how you pay a whore not to fuck you, but to leave afterwords. His solitude is as much of an addiction as the fucking. (This is somewhat actually to his credit -- at least he doesn't have a wife or girlfriend that he's constantly fucking around on, like all-too-many severe pussy hounds.)

Another good movie on the topic is AUTO FOCUS, about the life of actor Bob Crane, whose career was hampered (and life was probably ended) by relentless womanizing and early experiments with home sex tapes:



Kind of funny in this day and age though -- we've got people like Kim Kardashian and Paris Hilton whose careers pretty much exist solely because of home sex tapes, and poor Bob Crane couldn't get work because of them, and ends up strangled in a hotel room with his skull caved in.

And of course, the problem with relentless fucking -- it's like all compulsions, it just escalates and you've got to do more and more extreme shit to capture the initial thrill. More dangerous women, more complicated and dominant scenarios, less sanitary acts.

And the end result of THAT of course is that, worst-case scenario, you might end up like somebody like Gary Heidnik:



So there you go. A public service announcement from English Teacher X. When you've got hookers locked up in the basement, it's time to admit you've got a problem.