Guess Who's Back

I'm back! The modern world, holy crap. One minute you're sunning yourself in the Mediterranean, the next you're in your mom's spare bedroom staring moodily out at the rain and catching up on all your internet shit.

I stayed off the internet pretty much completely during the holiday, although I did write some stuff, so I'll be posting a lot the next few days.

So! Here we go.

GENERAL THOUGHTS ON CYPRUS

Of course three weeks doesn't really give me any great insight into a country that despite its rather tragic history of colonization, revolution, and invasion, still manages to embrace cheap Jaeger shots and cocktails named after sex acts.

The touristy areas of Ayia Napa reminded me an awful lot of the Florida spring breaks of my youth, from the beer bongs and cheap shots right down to shops that sold "this is your brain in Cyprus!" t-shirts and swords and throwing stars. Except with Russians and Norwegians.

(Of course there weren't any Russians in clubs in those days. That would have been a Red Dawn situation if that shit happened.)



Yet Cyprus impressed me! Great weather, crystal clear water, reasonable prices, and if you should happen to tire of the bronzed and busty Cyprus babes, there's always the hordes of Russians (both resident and tourist -- about 50,000 resident Russians there, I heard.) Even my taxi driver was a good-looking Ukrainian woman.

And also an interesting array of historical sites, including a church with the tomb of famous undead zombie friend of Christ, Lazarus.

THE GF

As far as the girlfriend -- we're still at a bit of a stalemate -- she doesn't want to leave her job until she has a ring on her finger. I offered to move her to Cyprus in January, where there's a well-developed "marriage tourism" industry for Russians -- and she agreed to think about it -- otherwise I'll go back to Vodkaberg, just in time for the Dead of Winter. And the Olympics.

In the meantime? Got a few interesting ideas, none of them much involving America.

Stay tuned -- same X time, same X channel!