Monday, January 26, 2015

Requiem for the Goose

On paper, being a stripper looks like a pretty good job. (To a certain kind of eye, anyway.) Guys give you money just for looking at you. I mean, they look at you anyway, why not get paid for it? You can hang out all night, drink, party, meet a lot of frat boys and rappers and ballers and rich guys and so forth. Fat money for having fun, right?  

But of course, like English teaching, MMA fighting and being a PUA, that shit takes its toll on your mind and your body. 

The Goose circa 2007

Of all the Russian I knew, especially the crew that moved to America, I worried about the Goose the most. 

She was big, drunk, vulgar, slutty, and only on rare occasions the smartest person in the room. (Like for example, if she was alone.) 

But she had a kind heart, an affectionate heart. Reliable? Trustworthy? No. Kind, loving, gentle? Sure.

She was in her late 20s back in 2013 when I went down there to see her, and that's about when strippers reach their sell-by date, unless they take good care of themselves. (She didn't.) 

I wouldn't have imagined a good end for her, unfortunately. She was still illegal at that time, after more than 5 years in America. Plenty of drugs and alcohol. Making less money than she was spending. 


Well, recently on Facebook she posted that she had just gotten up at 6:00am, And everyone in the comments asked why. 

She responded: first day at Fort Lauderdale Cosmetology College. 

The Goose decided to go to Beauty School!

Recently she's also been going to church, and has posted a couple of things like "Remember that God loves us!" and "Pray for somebody you love today!"

Happy ending? 

We'll see, but it seems like the odds have improved, at least. 

So let's take a moment to remember her as she was: 

The Goose and Slappy's Wife, circa 2006

The Goose, shortly before I jumped into bed with her

Maybe if you're of that frame of mind, you can even say a little prayer for my big, formerly vulgar, formerly drunk, former stripper friend the Goose.

Read about the Goose and other Russians in America, as well as my
own middle-aged adventures. MORE INFO AND BUYING OPTIONS here. 


Anonymous said...

Old Truckers Never Die.....They just get another Peterbilt.

Old Strippers Never Die....They just go to Beauty School.

Old PUA's Never Die.....They just go to the Phils when the Alpha gives way to a 48'' waist.

englishteacherx said...

Old English teachers never die because their present is always perfect.