Wednesday, July 04, 2007

Proving My Machismo

Another birthday party for a friend, another couple of Russian guys challenging me to prove my worthiness by drinking a lot of vodka and then jumping in the river naked.

Give me a challenge, man, that's easy.

If only it were so easy to prove you're cool to the rest of the world at large.

Although after I blacked out, I did lose my sunglasses.


Anonymous said...


How about an breakdown of typical living costs for english teachers.

Whats the average pay, and what is the average expense account including booze. Just how far does $600 get you?

Anonymous said...

Jesus fucking christ. Who doesn't want money? I'm 26, an attractive, thin, blond American, and if I were a man, I'd want to be a whoremongering alcoholic, just like English Teacher X. I just got the boot (technically, medical separation) from our venerable government because I happened to bring sedatives with me to a land of very attractive men without first alerting the powers that be. They should be fucking pleased that I want to work at all. I could probably live happily in poverty in some central American country with the money they give me for my mental health issues. As it is, I don't doubt I could be successful in the world of work. Sadly, I have a substantial work ethic, am appalled by the idea of personal failure, and even (shock, horror) have some brains. I'm also on my third vodka tonic since I awoke two hours ago. Here's hoping I have some chance of succeeding as an English Teacher. I hated most of those obscenely wealthy 5 year-old Koreans. My former Soviet Union 17-soon-to-be 18 year-old villager misses me. I hate life.

Anonymous said...

I think you should have your own
blog young lady :-)

Drunken Girl X

Travel is fun without any Government restrictions!

English Teacher X said...

half-liter beer from shop = $1.
entrance to night club = $10 - $25
pizza at cheapish place = $8
Big Mac meal = $4
can of tuna fish = $1.25
beer at most cafes = $2 - $4
kilogram of bananas = $1.25
clothes == a fucking lot
ride on the bus = about 40 cents
bottle of vodka = $5 - $10
unlimited DSL Internet = upwards of $50
used mobile phone = $30

Jeez, certainly are a lot of interesting people hanging around here suddenly. Girls? Come on, get real you trolls. . .

Anonymous said...

I've been hanging around here for the past year. I couldn't bring myself to take the EF job a 10 minutes' walk from Red Square, and I don't want any competition from a bunch of trollops anyway, although all I heard from the venerable government agency was "Have a glass of wine and become a Russian whore." What I want is hot-blooded Caucasian and as many sedatives as I see fit. Fuck, fuck, fuck. The local man whore's phone has been disconnected, and god knows where he's been during my brief, fruitless sojourn to better parts.

Anonymous said...

Now what about the dodgy stuff?

Lap dance or table dance?

Recreational drugs? Do russians use them at all? If so at what cost?

How much does a good night out at a club set one back?

Not moscow. We know thats expensive.

Anonymous said...

Why is it that unattractive, fat, misshapen old hags always have to say they are attractive?

Think = Obese

American = Dumb

If I were a man = LESBIAN

Gap Kid.........OUT

English Teacher X said...

Nightclubs here in Vodkaberg are probably just as expensive as Moscow, actually. Entrance fee will be anywhere from $10 - $20, or more, like I said, and beers in a club cost a minimum of about $3 and a maximum of about $8. (There is one cheaper club where a draft still costs $1, but the hangover you get shows you that you get what you pay for.)

Lap dance, starting at around $50.

Everyone swears to me that Russians do lots of recreational drugs, but I've yet to see any evidence of that. I've smoked some decent hash here, but that was years ago so I don't know what it costs now.

Judging by the needles on the ground, smack is cheap and plentiful.