Best of X: Typical Teacher Types

When I was making the old website, I quickly realized that hand-drawing the cartoons and then getting them scanned was going to be both time-consuming and even expensive. (This was 2003, remember.)

So I quickly determined that using the English Teacher X icon and the Paintbrush program could allow me to make all kinds of cheerfully colorful and lovably amateurish graphics. I never spent more than about 10 minutes on one of these things, but I'm in general very pleased with the results. They're distinctive.

These typical teacher types cartoons have been controversial, because a certain couple of people I know thought I drew them specifically about them, noting specific resemblance to the hideous little homunculi pictured. But in fact they were drawn before I met these people, and without anybody in particular in mind. Archetypes, sterotypes, whatever, regrettably there is often plenty of truth in them.

You can click on them to enlarge them and I've provided captions as I realize some of them are nearly impossible to read, especially the Bloated Middle-Aged Whoremonger.

If you'd like to see them in their original posting -- at a nice size -- you can do so here.

>ENGLISH TEACHER X-FILES NUMBER ONE: The Mean Old Bastard
NATIONALITY: British
AGE: Over 50
TRAINING: Lots, and lots of experience
HOBBIES: Complaining, Drinking

ENGLISH TEACHER X-FILES NUMBER TWO: The Hip Young Dude
NATIONALITY: American or English
AGE: 20 - 30
HOBBIES: Shagging students, going to nightclubs

ENGLISH TEACHER X-FILES NUMBER THREE: Frumpy Yet Idealistic Young Woman
NATIONALITY: Probably American
AGE: 25 - 29
TRAINING: MA
HOBBIES: Studying the local language, eating dinner with students

ENGLISH TEACHER X-FILES NUMBER FOUR: The Bloated Middle-Aged Alcoholic
NATIONALITY: British
AGE: 40 - 50
TRAINING: Maybe a cheap certificate course
FAVORITE ACTIVITY; Whores, alcohol

>ENGLISH TEACHER X-FILES NUMBER FIVE: The Professional
NATIONALITY: British
AGE: 28 - 37
TRAINING: CELTA, DELTA, etc
HOBBIES: Preparing for lessons, giving training seminars, spreading rumors about other teacher's skills, using jargon

You know, of all these, it seems that the one I see the least, these days, is The Professional. (The only ones who act that way, these days, are the non-native teachers of English.)