Sunday, March 25, 2007

I'll Rip Your Testicles Off

One of the teachers here recently broke up with his girlfriend; a bit of a bad one for him, it would seem. He's been making a valiant effort to go out and meet a new one, though. He met a girl at the House of Pain nightclub last week and exchanged a few SMS messages with her, agreeing to meet sometime.

Then on Thursday night a 2:30am he received a message reading (translated from Russian) as follows:

Don't send another message or call Elena again, or I'll rip your testicles off. I'm not joking. Her boyfriend, Sergei.


Feeling perhaps that his point had not been clearly made, Sergei then called my colleague the next morning, reiterating his point.

My colleague said, "Yeah, sure, whatever" or something like that and hung up. He was in class with an individual student, a young Russian businessman, at the time.

The young Russian businessman, when my colleague explained the situation, offered to get a couple of guys together and go pay a visit to this Sergei.

My colleague said that wouldn't be necessary.

Sharing this story with us over pizza and beer, our first response was that we should take the number of this Elena, and have every single teacher we know send her romantic messages constantly.

My colleague didn't like the idea though. I felt like an insult of this nature should not be left alone, but, well, they're his testicles, I guess.

4 comments:

OldEnglishBastard said...
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Anonymous said...

"but, well, they're his testicles, I guess."
You guess? you mean you are not sure?
Hey Mr X you used to have such balls but lately you've gone all flippy floppy and wobbly. Where did it all go wrong? or right?
u used ta b so good-Work it out we miss the old X!!
Bukowski would be ashamed of you!

English Teacher X said...

My god, I'm under threats from all sides. . .

Yeah I'm old, no doubt about it. Must be all that thalium in the vodka.

English Teacher X said...

Anyway, Bukowski is dead. . .