Monday, July 02, 2007

Dear God, People Actually READ This Shit?

My god, 18 fucking responses. . . I had a whole post thought out, but I'm so fucking flabbergasted by the responses to my last two entries, I think I forgot it all. Hateful posts from a guy that works at the GAP? Jesus Christ. I'd boycott the Gap, if there was one here. And that one from the 29-year-old office guy, holy shit. . .

Anyway, you've all convinced me. I'm counting my fucking blessings, here.

Trying to remember what I wanted to post about. . . oh yeah, it was about getting laid. Contrary to popular belief, I have to say that being a foreigner in another country is NOT an automatic route to easily laying loads of hot chicks. (I mean, unless you flat out pay for it, of course, but you can do that anywhere.) I know at least two teachers here who rarely if ever manage it; nothing seriously wrong with either of them, they're just average looking guys who are a bit shy and awkward around women.

I've gone out with some pretty hot-looking girls here (although admittedly some real trollops, too) but I managed plenty of good-looking girls in America, too. (Although keeping them was more of a problem, and finding ones who weren't clinically insane.)

As for this constant theme of balding and fatness, you GAP guy, -- believe it or not, 38 years old and still got almost all of my hair and a reasonably trim and muscular 180 pounds (I'm about 6'0.) There's a little beer blubber on my sides, admittedly, but I go to the gym three or four times a week and can still do an eight-minute mile. I'm not the worst looking kitten in the basket.

It seems to me that most guys end up banging girls who probably don't look much better or worse than the caliber of babe they could score at home -- although perhaps they do it more often. It seems to me that guys go through the motions of meeting women a lot more frequently and confidently here than they probably actually would at home. They actually go to bars and actually talking to women, for example, instead of just sitting and staring at them and bitching.

A humorous example -- one new guy who arrived here said he came because of the women, and that he was "sick of American women because all they're interested in is money." We immediately crapped ourselves laughing.

I should also add that guys who come here who aren't particularly clear-headed about what they want from women end up getting married to the first girl that gets ahold of them. And usually having a child with them. And nobody can henpeck like a Russian woman. . . I know, let's see, of the twenty or so foreigners I've known here in the last five years, about five have ended up married.

One thing is that there's a lot less stigma about girls going out with older guys in Russia, so that's handy. Of course, one reason I rarely go out with women older than 23 is that they're usually all married by that age. (All the girls I knew five years ago are married now.) You meet older divorced women occasionally, but not often, because they're too busy with the job and kids.

Now of course, being the sensitive and intelligent guy that I am, I have often accused girls I know of liking me only because I'm a foreigner, when drunk and angry. There were cases where it was surely true, but they see pretty quick that I'm neither looking for marriage nor do I have any money, so those ones are weeded out fairly quickly. The free English lesson factor is a bit more tricky -- as one of my English groupies pointed out, a lot of girls like to go out with teachers -- she'd been banging one of her university professors when I met her.

I was talking with a girl I've been going out recently, and I asked her whether she thought she'd actually be going out with me if I was a Russian guy of exactly the same salary level, job, age, appearance and personality. She said it was like asking if I'd like her if she was fat. And that if I was a Russian guy, I wouldn't have the same personality, anyway.

In the other countries I've been in, the situation was similarly complicated. In Thailand, you pretty much had two choices -- marry a nice girl, or fuck whores. In Korea there was a small contingent of English groupies who'd like to have sex with a foreign guy, but a considerably higher number who'd never consider going out with a white guy. In Prague, the girls were generally not too impressed by foreigners, as there were a lot of them.

Okay, off to stack our new 29.99 relaxed fit chinos. . . oh wait, no. I'm going to go sit for 90 minutes and talk to an attractive professional woman, and get paid for it.

And yes, I was drunk on the beach, surrounded by Slavic beauties, from Friday afternoon at about 2:00pm until Sunday evening at about nine. . .


Anonymous said...

I wouldn't get too excited X....17 of them were from you writing as other people!!!

I sold some hugely expanded man with the face and personality of a 13 year old some jeans today. He was with his Mom.

He was back from three years in Japan teaching english. This must be quite a regular ocurrence for paed........I mean wandering souls who teach english.

Go home to Momma when your money runs out and the family of that ****** *** **** **** ********* ********.

English Teacher X said...

I agree that there's something vaguely suspicous about the post by the 29 year old. But I'm far too busy banging barely-legal poontang to write something so lengthy, in addition to my new interest in blogging. And oiling my paunch.

What's all that shit with the stars supposed to mean?

Anonymous said...

Suspicious? I challenge any single guy under 35 who went to college and works an office job to explain to me where they see major differences in their own life.

Work consumes you. I have maybe 18 hours a week doing what I want to with the people I want to do it with.

Money means nothing unless you are wealthy as fuck. Whats the point of having a lot of money if you have no time to spend it? Or when you do spend it you have no time to enjoy what you buy?

I would rather take less money with less responsibility doing something different with my life. At the moment, the only stories I am going to have for my grandkids will be about mergers, aquisitions and the weirdo in accounting.

The scary thing is that the lifestyle I lead is something most kids in college aspire to.

Only reason Im on this site is that I intend to work while I travel, and teaching was the best option. I relate to X because he is honest about his reasons for travel.

Anonymous said...

It actually IS what most kids aspire too. They're really all brainwashed rather well. Perfect pod-people. You should read Douglas Coupland's Generation X. You'll understand it.

Regardless, I applaud you at least in recognizing it. Most do not have the courage to admit that a slave is a slave is a slave, regarless of whether or not the Cage is chrome, silver, or in your case, gold.

Just a tip. When I worked in Manhattan, hitting the bars in the Village, mid-town, the upper East side, were ALL demoralizing. Try to find the most blue-collar area possible, and spend your recreation time there. I use to go to Yonkers. Not as many uptight, high-maintanence snarches :-)