I Went Down To The Sea, And It Didn't Say Nothing, It Just Waved

Got back from my trip to an Egyptian Red Sea resort yesterday. It was the first time I've ever stayed at a 5-star resort -- three pools, 4 restaurants, right on a beach that had coral and fish . . . being from the American south, I can tell you that something very nasty about human nature is unleashed by an all-you-can-eat buffet, and this place had four of them, three times a day.

Basically me and my cute little Russian minx didn't do much other than eat, swim, and have sex -- although we got a little TV watching in there in the evening I guess. Alcohol was free there, also, before 11.00, so I had a few beers and gin and tonics, but not especially to excess. (The girl I went with doesn't drink much.) We took a boat trip out to some islands and coral reefs one day, and I'm happy to say that there are still some good ones, despite there being more tourists than fish and more tour boats than living formations these days.

The clientele of the resort was mostly German and Russian, mainly families with small children; as to who was more red-faced, bloated, and who wore the most inappropriately sized swimwear, I'd give a slight edge to the Germans. But only a slight one.