Ballroom Dancer Returns: Pregnancy Tourism

So many of you readers probably are going through (or have gone through) that phase where it seems that all of your friends are getting married and / or having babies.

Since I spent my 30s mostly hanging around with people 10 - 15 years younger than me in Russia, I'm now (at 44) going through that phase for the second time; most of the people from VODKABERG are spawning like salmon recently.

Almond Eyes just had a baby last week; I contacted Ballroom Dancer on Facebook the other day and she revealed she's also expecting.

So read this and  check out WHERE she's going to have the baby ...

Ballroom Dancer circa 2006

(This is a link to the last conversation I had with her in July; recall that she is working in the field of event management in Moscow.) 

1/7, 11:56pm

English Teacher X

I had a sex dream about you last night

1/7, 11:56pm

Ballroom Dancer

wow surprising)))

1/7, 11:56pm

English Teacher X

yeah, surprised me also

1/7, 11:57pm

Ballroom Dancer

))))

1/7, 11:57pm

English Teacher X

never know what's in the back of the brain

1/7, 11:57pm

Ballroom Dancer

you will be more surprised if i tell you that i look like kolobok))))))

cos im pregnant 7 month already

1/7, 11:57pm

English Teacher X

kolobok?

1/7, 11:57pm

Ballroom Dancer

))))

1/7, 11:57pm

English Teacher X

oh really?

well congratulations

1/7, 11:58pm

Ballroom Dancer

thanks)

1/7, 11:58pm

English Teacher X

what does koloblok mean?

1/7, 11:58pm

Ballroom Dancer

its a hero of russian fairy

1/7, 11:58pm

English Teacher X

so you were pregnant the last time I talked to you and you didn't know it yet

1/7, 11:59pm

Ballroom Dancer

round small... i dont know who....kolobok)

1/7, 11:59pm

English Teacher X

i can only imagine how huge your breasts must be

1/8, 12:00am

Ballroom Dancer

its looks the same more or less)))

but the belly..... bigger then breast

1/8, 12:01am

English Teacher X

right

1/8, 12:01am

Ballroom Dancer

and its scare me

sometimes)))

1/8, 12:01am

English Teacher X

well it's just hormones, making you feel strange emotions, I suppose

1/8, 12:01am

Ballroom Dancer

how are you?

1/8, 12:02am

English Teacher X

i'm rather terrible, in general

1/8, 12:02am

Ballroom Dancer

im not a real mother)))

1/8, 12:02am

English Teacher X

you are the most natural mother I can imagine!

1/8, 12:02am

Ballroom Dancer

??

tell me

1/8, 12:02am

English Teacher X

you always were.

1/8, 12:02am

Ballroom Dancer

))

1/8, 12:02am

English Teacher X

unless you changed a lot!

1/8, 12:03am

Ballroom Dancer

im fine with myself, this is the best my achievement

tell me about you

1/8, 12:03am

English Teacher X

sure

1/8, 12:03am

Ballroom Dancer

where are you today?

1/8, 12:03am

English Teacher X

oh I came back to (the Kingdom in the Middle East) 

but it's a terrible job, although salary is very high

I get paid $8000 a month to stand in front of classes of boys from country while they refuse to study 

1/8, 12:05am

Ballroom Dancer

difficult situation with class, but salary has to smooth it)

1/8, 12:05am

English Teacher X

well, i live in terrible place, you can see pictures on here somewhere

it's not even a real house

like a camp

1/8, 12:06am

Ballroom Dancer

can you change it?

1/8, 12:06am

English Teacher X

this city is awful also, nothing here, although there is a beach nearby

but I can go to Dubai and Bahrain to have fun on the weekends, so I suppose I should not complain

1/8, 12:07am

Ballroom Dancer

oh yeah

1/8, 12:07am

English Teacher X

taking the girl to Maldives in February, maybe we will make some decision. But I don't think so

What makes me angry, i turned down a job in Dubai to take this job, because I thought it would be more professional because it's a big international company

but it's worst job I ever had

students are all company firemen and security guards who have to study English they don't need

But anyway, only 6 more months and I'm finished

1/8, 12:10am

Ballroom Dancer

maybe then you will move to dubai? i think its one of the best places for live and work

i dont mind to move there)

1/8, 12:12am

English Teacher X

yeah, I will try to get job there in the fall, I suppose

i have two friends who work there, but they were not very happy with their jobs, but they like living there

I wish I had taken that job, salary is less but I could have more life

1/8, 12:13am

Ballroom Dancer

at least you can teach students who need english)))

1/8, 12:13am

English Teacher X

they said it's same problem there, all the students are rich kids, they don't care about it also

my students aren't rich though

1/8, 12:14am

Ballroom Dancer

strange. usially when l meet the local men there they speak english

1/8, 12:15am

English Teacher X

well see, anybody that wants to study English they can go to England or whatever and learn it

they said most of the students there are women and they don't care about it

All Emirates people get money from government just for being Emiratis, so they can do whatever they want

1/8, 12:16am

Ballroom Dancer

ah i see

and you should be careful with local woman

1/8, 12:16am

English Teacher X

it would be nice to teach woman again

1/8, 12:16am

Ballroom Dancer

)))))

sure

1/8, 12:16am

English Teacher X

i'm tired of these country boys

they take off their shoes in class, they hate even to wear shoes

1/8, 12:17am

Ballroom Dancer

are they rude?

1/8, 12:18am

English Teacher X

oh they're terrible

1/8, 12:20am

Ballroom Dancer

i bet you want to whip them all))))))

1/8, 12:21am

English Teacher X

i just want them to go away

the government just doesn't want them running around the streets, so they give them jobs for the state oil company

there's big demographic problem here, too many young guys

(and girls, I guess, but I don't see them)

1/8, 12:23am

Ballroom Dancer

of course)

1/8, 12:25am

English Teacher X

1/8, 12:25am

English Teacher X

this is where I live

1/8, 12:26am

Ballroom Dancer

why dont you rent something more nice?????

1/8, 12:26am

English Teacher X

well, I could, but then I would have to buy furniture

want to get out quickly

also there's a pool here, I like that

1/8, 12:27am

Ballroom Dancer

)))

English Teacher X

1/8, 12:27

1/8, 12:27am

Ballroom Dancer

)))

1/8, 12:28am

English Teacher X

and there's security also, big wall with guards

1/8, 12:28am

Ballroom Dancer

is it important?

1/8, 12:28am

English Teacher X

i dont know, probably not

also nice cheap restaurant here

1/8, 12:28am

Ballroom Dancer

just finish there and move to dubai

1/8, 12:29am

English Teacher X

I want to finish the contract because then I get bonus of more than one month's salary

1/8, 12:29am

Ballroom Dancer

nice deal

1/8, 12:29am

English Teacher X

even so, many guys can't finish it

1/8, 12:29am

Ballroom Dancer

i will try to go to miami for baby delivery in a week

1/8, 12:30am

English Teacher X

guy went crazy the other day, started screaming and crying, security guards had to take him away

1/8, 12:30am

Ballroom Dancer

God!!!

1/8, 12:30am

English Teacher X

did you already get american visa?

why not EU?

1/8, 12:30am

Ballroom Dancer

of course!)

want to have small american boy)))

1/8, 12:30am

English Teacher X

America is terrible place to live now

I visited (Slappy's Wife) there last summer, working as stripper

remember her?

1/8, 12:31am

Ballroom Dancer

we are not going to live there) just US passport

yeah, i remember

1/8, 12:31am

English Teacher X

but why do you need one, better to have EU passport

1/8, 12:31am

Ballroom Dancer

what a terrible story

1/8, 12:31am

English Teacher X

then you could go to America anyway

or Europe isn't so generous to Baby Tourists?

1/8, 12:32am

Ballroom Dancer

whats wrong?

it is popular as well

but ive chosen good climate for next half of a year

want to be far from moscow and work

1/8, 12:33am

English Teacher X

Eh, I'd much rather live in Cyprus or Greece or somewhere

same kind of climate

I guess a lot of Russians like Miami though

it has its good points, I guess

plenty of Russians there now, especially in Hallandale Beach

1/8, 12:34am

Ballroom Dancer

oh its so popular, so many planes fly every day

miami custom is going crazy))))

thats the place im going to i guess

1/8, 12:35am

English Teacher X

(Slappy's Wife) doesn't live in Miami, but one of her friends lives there

1/8, 12:35am

Ballroom Dancer

but russian place is sunny isle

1/8, 12:35am

English Teacher X

fat and drunk and crazy now

yeah, sunny isle, that's where she lives

it's about 30 - 45 minutes from South Beach

maybe less

how long will you stay there/

1/8, 12:36am

Ballroom Dancer

until the end of June i guess

1/8, 12:37am

English Teacher X

who with?  not just you, surely. mom and dad?

1/8, 12:38am

Ballroom Dancer

mostly with dad. when the time for delivery husband and mom too. then i  dont know

may be along sometime

may be not

some friends want to come

i know some russian girls there as well

1/8, 12:41am

English Teacher X

have you been to America before?

1/8, 12:44am

Ballroom Dancer

of course

i even work 2 years ago there

planned the wedding

1/8, 12:45am

English Teacher X

in Miami?

1/8, 12:45am

Ballroom Dancer

in Newport, Road Island

but i travel a lot

1/8, 12:45am

English Teacher X

Rhode Island

1/8, 12:46am

Ballroom Dancer

NY, Boston, Miami, LA, Vegas, SFr

yes

)))

i wish i can go for party in Miami, but belly doesnt like it)))))))

1/8, 12:47am

English Teacher X

oh, well, yeah, nice strip clubs there

1/8, 12:47am

Ballroom Dancer

sorry not for me)))

1/8, 12:47am

English Teacher X

Went to Scarlett's Cabaret, you should have seen those girls , they were spinning around like Cirque De Soleil

except naked

1/8, 12:48am

Ballroom Dancer

)))))

1/8, 12:50am

English Teacher X

all right, I'm going for shower, and you should be sleeping anyway

good luck with it! I'm only a facebook away if you need anything

1/8, 12:51am

Ballroom Dancer

thank you my darling. you are in my heart! if you will have a chance ill be waiting for you in Miami)

1/8, 12:52am

English Teacher X

hmm, well, unfortunately I'll be here until July

the end of July

most likely be in America all of August

1/8, 12:53am

Ballroom Dancer

ill see you in dubai then)))

next year

i love to come there

1/8, 12:53am

English Teacher X

i might well be in moscow or samara for a while in the fall

anyway, paka

1/8, 12:54am

Ballroom Dancer

poka!

*  *  *

So there you go. For every disenfranchised spoiled white American college kid who goes abroad to get a crappy English teaching job, move into a crappy apartment, and bang himself into oblivion, there is one serious-minded Russian, Brazilian or Chinese ready to have a baby there to take your place, get your steady boring corporate job, and get that mortgage and car you don't want.

Thus is equilibrium maintained. Globalism works all ways, baby.