Sunday, October 14, 2007

Fled

English Teacher D came here in August. He's a friend of the guy that decided to come to Vodkaberg after seeing the English Teacher X website.

He got pushed around and menaced by a group of Russian youths on his first night in town; black-out drunk on vodka, he decided he wanted to practise his Russian with some locals, at 3 or 4 am on the beach; when he and his friend decided to leave, they got shoved around a bit and insulted.

Nothing too serious though.

The next night the events of this story happened, in which an innocent party turned into a seige. In truth, I think he slept through most of that incident, or at least the end of it.

The next Saturday, he and two other teachers were attacked by a group of young men in a park and relieved of their phones and money.

A week or two after that, he got grabbed by the police while going out of a nightclub; strangely, however, they were very nice to him and gave him a ride home. He sent me an SMS telling me this, written while drunk -- "duck this antansy!" his phone offered as a T9 dictionary alternative to his badly spelled "fuck this country."

All the while, he was discovering that English teaching really IS difficult and boring, that English teacher bar conversations really ARE banal and disgusting.

I think there were a few other incidents; or maybe it was just his damp, cold flat that was the deciding factor. The black-out drunks and the toxic two-day hangovers surely didn't help.

He's leaving this Wednesday.

As DOS, I'm considering some new ideas for teacher training inspired by the movie THE BOURNE ULTIMATUM - sleep deprivation, water boarding and situational brainwashing to inspire maximum loyalty and dedication. "Can you commit yourself to this program?"

SPOILER ! ! !

Although I didn't like the end where he turns into an amphibian and swims away. . .

END SPOILERS ! ! !

27 comments:

Anonymous said...

You just ruined the fucking movie for me idiot!!!

I aways knew Jason Bourne was a mutant alien from outer-space.

Anonymous said...

On the RUN.. My question is this... Did the pedophile on the run from Interpol in Thailand ever work in Vodkaburg for your school?

http://www.guardian.co.uk/crime/article/0,,2192116,00.html

Anonymous said...

I am loving the site and blog X. You are a great teacher!

Anonymous said...

The second & third poster beat me to it: creepy English-teaching paedophile (the cops will have no trouble rounding up a group of sadsack deviant English teachers abroad to pad out that line up) fled Seoul for Bangkok after his photos posted on the internet (nobody ever accused English teachers of being smart) were discovered by Interpol and their crack cyber-intel team managed to break the "swirly pattern" he used to blank out his face.

Oh no, the good name of English teaching everywhere has been besmirched by this awful fellow!

Did I say "awful fellow"? I meant "poster boy for Western English teachers in Asia and everywhere abroad".

Shouldn't be long now before TOEFL is a universal badge of degeneracy, sleeze and perversion. Or at last acknowledged as such by immigration officials globally. Everyone else has known it for the last 15 years.

Teaching in Thailand and Korea-where have I heard that resumè before?

Anonymous said...

paedophiles work in all jobs, not just teaching English abroad.

Get off it.

you're probably bitter because you've never traveled outside of your small town. Your mom wont let you.

Anonymous said...

"Shouldn't be long now before TOEFL is a universal badge of degeneracy, sleeze and perversion..."

"TOEFL"? Well, there'd be a lot of confused exchange students if that were correct, you dumbass. Get your acronyms right.

(BTW, is that you, Chastity?)

Anonymous said...

I think it is terrible how folk group teachers and paedophiles together. I personally try to help the children to learn and to discover the world. I also teach biology!!!

Go X!!!

Jason said...

wow, that sounds rough. The worst I got is that the chick I'm banging wants to be my friend and I did not feel like waiting 8 minutes for the tram so I walked home safely and that I have to wear a tie while making way too much money to teach some hotties (and there are some dudes in the class too but who notices them?)

Anonymous said...

I’m sorry but English teachers don't make a lot of money, even when they only do corporate and private lessons. My friend clears $1500 a week, he doesn't work with "hotties", but they sure follow him everywhere he goes. English teachers are lucky to clear that in a month.

English teaching is a convenient situation for those who are usually inept in their original situations. That is why it attracts a lot of pedophiles, because of relaxed attitudes for their "deviance". Not all teachers are sickos, but the majority have some sort of "issue" that had to be resolved by fleeing to a "better place"

Anonymous said...

I disagree.

Anonymous said...

or some are just backpackers looking to bankroll their travels through more exotic locations while they eat the food, drink the booze and fuck the local women

Anonymous said...

Most people have something to run away from in life. I don't know many people in this world who are truly happy, do you? It's better to run away and start fresh someplace else, than to stay and be miserable, just some of us move to another country.
Nobody gets into this to get rich. However, if you are competent, are in a location (developing country) where the economy is growing fast and have been there for a while, hussle and are well established, you could do alright. This trade does attract deviants, losers, backpackers and hacks, but they usually don't stay in one place very long.
I've read Jason's blog. It's interesting, but he does see life through rose coloured glasses it seems. From what I've read, he has roomates where he lives in Germany, when he travels(Mr. World traveller) he couch surfs, he's probably (judging from the link on his blog) a platinum member of the hospitality club. Great when you're in your early twenties, but a bit pathetic in your 30's.
Hate to say it Jason, but there are others in this lame trade doing much better than you pal. They have their own flats and don't mooch their way around the world.... Nice blog though, you just shouldn't gloat so much...

Anonymous said...

$1500??? Speak for yourself. I'm making more than twice that (yes in TEFL)and I live in a developing country (not Moscow)..... Keep up the negative posts on how lowly and badly paid TEFL is on this and all the other TEFL related websites, please! It keeps people discouraged from getting into TEFL in this part of the world and my income higher.....

Anonymous said...

Jason! He's the Greatest! He's my idol. Like Austin Powers "International Man of mystery". He even had a girlfriend straight out of James Bond, could you believe her name was Assi yeah! From the pictures on his blog, I'd tap that Ass yeah!!!!! Yeah, baby yeahhhh!

Anonymous said...

Shagadelic baby, ASSSiYEAHHH.

Anonymous said...

Hey Jason, could you post some more yummy pictures of Assiyeah on your blog, I need some more spank bank material mmmmmmm. Shagalicious, baby.

Anonymous said...

Jason is a wuss, part wimp part puss. Read his blog, another typical "Wimpus Americanus". Assiyeah, after walking all over him for 5 years, dumps his sorry ass. The reason she walked all over him was because he let her, instead of gangster slappin' the bitch from day one.
His new chick "A" is also fleeing the coop. This hospitality club mooch can't even mooch right. Here's another hot looking pieceof Ass(see pictures) going to Italy for some cool job which any self respecting mooch would see as an opportunity to dump cold and boring Germany for the beautiful south, a chance to bang and mooch and be happy and all he does is call her by the "F" word, I mean (friend) because to any Cocksmith, that just what that word is, a four letter word. Thery're going to be "buds" coooeeel. No wonder why the USA is going down the toilet.

Anonymous said...

Jason vs. X. The battle of the blogs. Let the festivities begin.

Anonymous said...

Did you see that picture of the "hot Ukrainian" babe on Jason's blog? He's sooo weak, all he could take was her picture, instead of her Ass, pathetic! He seems to have bad luck with anything involving ASS.

Anonymous said...

Jason is a short, ugly, loud-mouthed Danny DeVito looking mother-fucker.

End of.

He is probably a virgin. At least X has attitude..not the type you put on like a cheap jacket, but the type you are born with.

X.....you were looking good on that picture from BKK airport...good haircut! My tip would be the Siratanopopong International School, they are desperate and will even leave u unsupervised with young Asian kids.

Anonymous said...

You just leave Jason alone! Jason is a sensitive teddy bear. He's soft and cuddly, the type of friend that girls can hang out with on a Saturday night, have pizza and eat junk food together, talk about all their guy problems then curl up in a nice cozy warm bed and not have to worry about being touched and fondled. Mmmmmmmm.

Anonymous said...

Hey X the split Gap Kid/X personality bit isn't working.

Anonymous said...

I once masturbated over a pair of my mother's BIG panties.

I regularly committed incest.

I hate myself.

I tried to commit suicide, but, like everything else, I failed miserably and just fucked up my liver EVEN MORE!

Anonymous said...

You need to read Jason's blog. It will make you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Anonymous said...

The nights are so cold.

I pray to god, but he doesn't listen.

Why does he put such fiends in my way?

Anonymous said...

"No wonder why the USA is going down the toilet."

notice how people who bash America, never state which country they are from themselves? Are you ashamed of your own homeland not to proudly represent it?

Also about calling Americans wimps, try walking down the street in my home city of Baltimore and say that, doubt you would have the balls to. Jason is hardly a typical American, but you are a typical troll.

Anonymous said...

"$1500??? Speak for yourself. I'm making more than twice that (yes in TEFL)and I live in a developing country (not Moscow)....."

Notice how he doesn't say which country he works in, which throws his credibility out the window, the only teflers that make that much work in Asia or ME, or work 80 hours a week doing mornings and nights and sucking the DOS's cock. So my question to him is, where is the cock of the DOS, you are sucking, located at?